Do it.

When people look back on their exchange year, most of them, hopefully, will tell you that it was the best year of their life. They will tell you that it was the best decision they ever made. They will talk about all the amazing things they experienced and the wonderful people they met. They will tell you how much they grew and how independent they have become. This is all so true. I cannot stress enough how glad i am that i chose to apply to be an exchange student. There had not been a day where i have regretted my decision.
I wanted to be challenged. and leaving, i knew that while exchange was going to be the best time of my life it would also be one of the hardest.
This is also very true.
Would you like to know what makes exchange the best year of my life thus far?
It's freaking hard.
I'm tellin' ya. Some days you aren't going to want to get out of bed.
Last week, i spent lunch in the bathroom crying. I have friends at school, it wasn't that. School is actually really fun. It's just some days you have to cry. Because even though everything can be so incredibly wonderful, it doesn't mean that this hasn't been the hardest years of my life.
Sometimes you are going to feel alone.
Sometimes you are going to get frustrated and grow tired of putting yourself out there again and again and again.
There will be many awkward moments. There's no avoiding it.
Sometimes you are going to feel lost.
Sometimes you aren't going to want to smile, but you will anyway. Because you are strong, and exchange makes you strong.
You will feel more insecure than you have in your entire life.
Exchange will test you. In ways that no other situation will.

Some days i don't want to eat bread with a knife and fork.

It's Christmas time folks. I'm spending my first Christmas away from Alaska. I don't want to go home. Denmark has become a second home to me. This Christmas i am so grateful for the people i get the opportunity to spend it with. My family has grown. Some of the people i've met here i have only known for a short while but i consider them family not friends. I am so showered in love.
This doesn't mean i don't miss Alaska. I miss my mom, dad, and Ben so much. Honestly today all i wanted was a big hug from my little brother. He gives the best hugs. I watch my siblings be silly with each other. I can't join in. It's only been a month. While i am comfortable, i'm not that comfortable. Ben i genuinely miss your obnoxious behavior.
I have never had so many mixed feelings in my life.

And you change. One of the hardest things for me is realizing that i no longer fit into the empty space i left less than five months ago. Some of the people who i was closest too i can no longer relate to. Some of the people who were the most important in my world...we no longer see eye to eye. I'm different. But i was ready for different. And looking back i realize i didn't really fit in that space anyway.

SO TO ANYONE WHO MAY BE CONSIDERING EXCHANGE IN FUTURE YEARS.

DO IT.

Honestly, even in the hardest times it's so so worth it. It's the best thing that will happen to you in life so far. I can't even imagine my life if i hadn't chosen this path. I would've been an entirely different person. And i love the person i am becoming. There will be days when you have never felt so terrible. But there will be days when you have never laughed so hard. Every day i fall in love. I am passionately in love with life. Never before have i been this deeply inspired. A good majority of that i credit to this experience so far. I can't express to you enough how completely extraordinary even the most un-extraordinary things seem.

I can't speak for anyone but myself. But coming from someone who is the middle of her exchange year right now. It's all that i could've hoped for X100000.

And that's pretty much all i have to say.

I'll update more about Christmas in a bit.